Hello Commons, you officially have an official online store. Right officially now. It’s called rePurpp – I filed the LLC before I knew I was going to be doing The Hillside Commons with my life, what can I say? – and the hypothetical reader can get there right from the menu on top of every one of your pages. Or by clicking this link (;
Hey, what’s with the tilde face? You’ve been my main website for more than 3 years now Commons, you have a special place in my heart; I don’t want you to think rePurpp is replacing you. The truth is that you’re both integral to my bookmaking operation, like peanut butter and jelly are integral to enjoying a toasted English muffin to the maximum degree. Let me tell you what it’s all about, then you can make a decision on how to feel.
So there are four collections, as Shopify’s devs like to call them, of products for sale on rePurpp: Bundles & Lots, Stuff With a Story, Autographed Books, and Merchandise. I’ll explain them one by one for you in order of… pride, I suppose. Is it wrong to be proud of your own work? If it is, I’m about as left as they get. Anyway:
- Stuff With a Story: Everything has a story, whether or not that story is true. In the case of the stuff in this collection, the story definitely isn’t true. Everything for sale here has an original flash fiction story attached to it; inventory is limited (there’s only one of each thing), and when one buys a thing, one gets a signed and laminated copy of the thing’s story along with it.
- I’d like to sell the laminated stories by themselves, too, after their corresponding stuff has been sold, but that’s a bit down the road yet.
- Autographed Books: This one’s pretty obvious, autographed copies of my fiction books! And I won’t just slap my name in there and drop the book in the mail, either. The autograph will say “For <hypothetical reader’s name>” above my signature, because the book is for the hypothetical reader. They’re more expensive than the unsigned copies available on Amazon, but that’s just the nature of the beast. As much as I would love to, I can’t quite offer Prime prices and shipping lol.
- Bundles & Lots: As of right now, one will find 14 specially autographed copies of my latest book, Convenient Incidents, in this collection. Convenient Incidents, for those who don’t know, is an anthology of 15 interconnected stories that were all inspired by random stuff. Each of the 14 copies comes with the thing that inspired one of the stories (one story was inspired by a Mother’s Day card I made for my mom, but I’m not selling that. Hence the 14).
- I’d also like to sell bulk lots of stuff here, and maybe mystery boxes too, but that’s a bit down the road. I’m just trying to get off the ground at this point, ya feel?
- Merchandise: You better believe I’m also selling The Hillside Commons merchandise. Truth be told, I only put this one together because I needed a fourth box on the store’s homepage, but it’s still cool. Currently there are 2 beanies and 2 t-shirts for sale, but I’m sure as I make more books I’ll make more apparel and whatnot to go along with them.
And that’s those! The flash fiction stories are going to be posted once a day on the blog starting tomorrow, just for you, Commons. There are 19 in total at the current time, and in the future I plan on adding Stuff With a Story inventory in groups of 19 products for a reason that either makes you smile or perplexes you. Who knows, maybe one day I’ll have enough stories to put a flash fiction anthology book together, too. That’d be pretty cool.
Also – for some reason I feel like this is really important – when shopping on rePurpp, one pays the price one sees. Shipping costs, sales tax, and whatever else are all included in the listing price of every single product, aside from the merch. The merch is dropshipped by a company called Printful, que sera sera.
Also also, in building the rePurpp website, I went through and updated you, Commons! You now have a proper homepage with a site directory for the convenience of the hypothetical reader. Cleaned up the Books page a little bit, too. And uh, yeah, that’s pretty much it.
Also also also, I am currently only shipping within the United States. Like I said, just trying to get off the ground at this point. The future will bring evolution, as it always does. A’ight, now that’s it.
Actually, one more thing. This one’s for the hypothetical reader: if you’re there, you should know that I have no idea what I’m doing. I’m just a 25-year-old eccentric hillbilly hippie dude from the woods of north Jersey who, after having trouble in English class all throughout high school and showing absolutely zero interest in the field of creative writing, started writing books one day after he withdrew from college where he studied psychology for 3ish years and business for a semester and a half! Truth be told, looking back at my life, it feels as though I subconsciously did everything in my power to not end up as a writer, but shit man, 8 books later and I’m still going strong. Funny how things work like that, isn’t it?
Regardless, I say all that to say this: If you’re there, hypothetical reader, thank you for being there. I appreciate you more than I know how to express. And I appreciate you, Commons, for popping into my head way back when you did. I know you and rePurpp are going to get along great, I’m very much looking forward to our future.
All right, here we are. rePurpp is open. Read my words. Buy my shit. That’s pretty much it.
Be well Commons~