The Ruler of Everything | TBN 7/10/21

Bookmaking log: TBN + 807 words

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Hey noted readers. I felt like doing this early today. I have 10 stories left to do in Convenient Incidents and the rest of today, plus all day tomorrow, to do ’em. All I really have to do is read through it, make changes where such is necessary. Such is necessary often, too, as finalizing CoIn involved changing the font from Times New Roman to Roboto Slab which messed up the, the uh, the word spacing? Wordination? There are big gaps between the words on some lines now, I call ’em justify gaps because they only appear when you hit the Justify align button. Not all books are justified, but uh, all of them should be. For the love of Christ, unless your book is a literal typed journal and you want to be cute about it (like I did in Untitled Bigfoot Project), JUSTIFY THE TEXT! AHHHHHH!!!!!

So uh… yeah, ‘man. I woke up at 12 and spent the majority of today downloading the remaining music in the Tally Hall collection (the 2 demo albums, Cojum Dip, Rob Cantor, and edu) and now I have it, I have it all, I have all of the Tally Hall. I won the video game. They were gonna be the best, ‘man, they were gonna be the greatest… but the ruler of everything had different plans.

For the love of CHRIST I hope The Hillside Commons doesn’t get hidden in the sand.

Also, I realized a while ago that I stopped putting the TBN wordcount in the Bookmaking log. Idk why I did that and idk why I’m only doing something about it now, but yeah!

Actually, I might know. I recently learned something that changes the weed game 100% – smoking out of pipes is not the move, unless they’re totally spotless. I never even thought about it before but when you smoke with a pipe – or if you’re like me, when you smoke HEAVILY with a pipe – a lot of resin and toxins and other carcinogenic bullshit gets trapped in the body of the pipe. That much I realized, that much is obvious, someone with half a liquid brain could figure that out, but here’s the thing: that bullshit gets reheated every time you take a hit, the fucking ghosts of powwows past rises from the sticky coating and mingles with the good smoke, flows into your lungs without you even realizing it, gets into your brain and fucks with your neurons, your awareness, your general biological wellbeing, the lost spirits of the damned and rejected and burned plant matter will literally haunt you if you smoke with a dirty pipe, how the fuck have I never realized this before?!?!?!?!

Strictly joints from now on, noted reader, with the occasional glasscrutch when the planets align. But for the most part, strictly joints.

Fucking Christ it feels good to just write. I don’t know what it is, when in actuality I do: I finished steps 1-11 of the secret project. The goddamn weight off my shoulders is indescribable. I sat in my chair when I started writing this and I just hit my head on the shitting ceiling, I am FLOATING right now!

One last thing: I think there’s a hidden message in the song Ruler of Everything by Tally Hall. On the surface, the song is about how time is the one true master of reality, that’s all well and good. But this is the chorus:

“You understand, mechanical hands, are the ruler of everything/
the ruler of everything/
I’m the ruler of everything in the end”

So that’s time singing to the listener, yeah? NO! That is Joe Hawley singing to the listener, you fucking whatever the shit you are, and here’s what he’s really trying to tell us: “Time is an illusion; it seems to be the master, but in the end, I am the ruler of everything.” Time governs us, yes, but when it really comes down to it, we are the masters of our destinies. Time is just the scenery, time is leaves on the trees, clouds in the sky. Time isn’t fucking real, we keep track of it for no goddamn reason and the only thing that matters is human action and intention.

Shit ‘man, look at this blog post. I can’t wait to write a new book. OTR is going to be book 13, okay, there’s going to be a book 14 that’s not original material, don’t pay any mind to that yet, and then book 15 is going to be something new. I don’t know what it’s going to-… wait, yes I do. I have the whole shit planned, I just need to clean off my table.


Since you’re there, noted reader, thank you for being there. From this day on, we move forever forward~

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