Under the Hood: The Imprisonment of Jonathan Knox was an experiment from the moment of its conception. I originally sat down with conspirator Sudz in… either late summer or autumn of last year. We were hiking a week or so prior and I was like, “Hey Sudz, get ready to boogie!” and he was like, “I got dance fever, motherfucker!” and I was like, “Neat! We’re making a book!” and he was like “SHHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII-“

that’s not what happened lmao, I wasn’t even there

We came up with the idea in the back half of last year and I started writing it, got a couple thousand words into the draft, and then decided to pump the breaks and finish Untitled Bigfoot Project. See, I started UBP, stopped, wrote Flowers, planned UtH, started UtH, went back and finished UBP, then restarted and completed UtH, then wrote OtR, and then I began the current project, an almost finished process known as The Great Revamp; what I’m saying is Sudz is a very patient ‘man and I appreciate his being a conspirator lmfao

So Under the Hood was the first book that another human being helped me create. When I say Sudz was a conspirator, that means he contributed during the brainstorming part of the bookmaking process. What we literally did was – and you’re gonna love this – flip through a Playboy from the late 70s looking for advertisements to base our story off of. We found a couple, too: the first of some dude smoking a cigarette in front of all sorts of listening equipment, like he was surveilling someone who didn’t know they were being surveilled; the second of a reverend with some variety talk show on the radio or something. Honestly they might have been the same ad, I don’t have the Playboy anymore. Let me be clear on this, I acquired the Playboy in a lot of… I don’t know exactly, but I had 3 boxes of vintage Playboys I bought in an online auction with the intent of reselling them because I thought they’d have collectable value, and I was right. I’ve since given the 3 boxes of Playboys back to the same auction company, they were put back through the auctions and I turned a profit on ’em so I think it’s pretty clear that Under the Hood was a successful endeavor overall.


So the characters Jonathan Knox, our titular and descriptular man who likes to eavesdrop on his neighbors, and Reverend Neil Campbell, the preacherman of Saint Wuester’s Church, were both created from the Playboy. The six racist police officers – Jim Hubert, Vern VanDunk, Gene Thorton, Billy Gene, Herm Billings, and Chief Daniel Maxwell – came entirely from imagination. Sudz said he wanted racist cops, so I made a bunch of racist cops. Sudz said he wanted to sacrifice a child, so I said let’s put that in the book instead, buddy and he begrudgingly agreed, and thus Sarah Hammond was born. I said I needed the book to be connected to The Fall of the Seven Earths and he said Well put that in your goddamn book, then! and I was like That’s what I’m saying, The Sudz! and he was like You son of a bitch! and then he rode his magic carpet back to Planet Eden and I haven’t…

wait… is this… am I The Bookmaker or the bookmaker right now? Fuck, dude, maybe I’m both.sseldrager snrub sibannac ehT

i’m making a lot of references to Over the River in this post. It is just occurring to me now that Under the Hood is really just one big reference to Over the River, except that it was written first. Damn, dude. Spirals and shit.

But uhhh, yeah, this one was an experiment. I think it went well, because it led to me writing this post. It was also my first post-1,000,000 project, so I granted myself a few liberties in diction. I’m the Bookmaker, ‘man, I’ll write what I damn well please.

I also remember this one being a slow write. In my other projects I’d get ridiculous numbers, like, I wrote 19,000+ words in one day during UBP, 21,000+ during Flowers. I think my max during UtH was around 5,000. Maybe a grand more, maybe less. I don’t know why it was slow going. The editing process was kind of slow, too, and so was the finalization process. It’s just kind of a slow book, to be real about it, and that’s okay. Slow doesn’t mean bad, doesn’t mean unacceptable, doesn’t mean go fuck yourself you shitty untalented fagget, back to the fucking warehouse! it just means it falls in with the 81% of books that are considered bullshit. Only 19% of books are good, noted reader, understand that and remember it well. In order to contribute to the 19%, you MUST contribute to the 81%, and the more you put in, the more you do, the better you get, the higher the chances you’ll contribute to the 19%. Of my 12 books, I consider 2 to be 19%ers: The Highest One Writing, like, the Reality edition, you can’t fuck with it, and Untitled Bigfoot Project, the novel about a writer who writes a novel called The Face of Fear and includes the full 70k novel The Face of Fear. Those two I consider to be 19%ers; the rest are 81s and I don’t give a hot goddamn if you think that’s not good enough, because that’s life, pal. Doesn’t mean I didn’t try, I tried my ass off on UtH, on all my shit, I’m The Bookmaker, I’m the guy, I’m the fucking magic man, and if you read it from cover to cover I can’t guarantee you’ll laugh because I don’t know you, you could be a goddamn lobotomy survivor, but you’ll probably have a good time, ‘man. If you know how to read, you’ll probably have a good time.

If you know how to read, you probably had a good time.

If you know how to read, you probably have good times.

this has been an under the hood look at under the hood: the under the hood under the hood under the hood under the hood

Since you’re there, noted reader, thank you for being there. From this day on, we move forever forward~

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