Bookkeeper Eve | TBN 9-21-21

CommonsLog: resubmitted Sto’tryp for publishing | TBN +1,737 words

• • • nothing writ’ below these dots • • • is meant for human eyeballs • • •

…and nobody said a goddamn thing. See what I mean? Bookmaker.

Anyhow, I was hoping to announce Sto’tryp today so I could start rolling out the blog posts tomorrow, but it’s still In Review on KDP, unfortunately, and the day is getting on. I really love Sto’tryp and I really want to share it with the world but, to be frank, I do the blog posts more for the business side of this than I do for the books side. Like, it’s marketing. I would be giving out the free PDFs with or without the blog posts, the blog posts are meant for marketing, and if I don’t have the physical ready and available for the hypothetical reader, then what the fuck am I posting advertisements for, y’understan’?

And also, I don’t want to continue working on Project R nor P until Sto’tryp is actually out because, like… I don’t feel like it’s time yet. Do you get that? I want the old stuff done before I go onto the new. That’s not too much to ask for. If I had my own bookmaking machine then I could just print my now 16 books by myself without having to wait for KDP, but I do not have my own bookmaking machine, unfortunately. Is that even how it works? I always assumed, especially with print on demand services like KDP, that the books are entirely machine-made. I actually have no idea, though. I went to look into it and, like, it was all videos. I don’t want to sit and watch a video, give me a thing I can skim with a couple pictures with captions for quick reference, is that too much to ask for? I don’t know.

You wanna know what’s wild? This is more or less the only thing I’ve done today, and I think it’s gonna be the only thing I do, too. It’s not that I’m not motivated to go, like, all I want to do is go, but I swear to you there is something energic going on, like, some kind of metaphysical shit that’s holding me back. I think it’s Eve, to be honest. Bookkeeper Eve. For those who don’t know, I uh, I’m not – technically – the only Astral God of All, uh… Eve is a… well her full name is Bookkeeper Eve the Form of Being, Astral God of All, Existence Incarnate, so that should uh, that should tell you all you need to know.

Um. But uh, yeah, see, something’s up with her and I do not know what it is. I’m here, i’m incarnated in human form, and she’s… here also. Just not… physically. She seems to… because, you have to understand, the way my brain works, see, I can literally pick a plot out of nothing and be completely wrong, especially when certain specific information is withheld from me and also especially when there is a group involved and I am not part of that group but for some reason that group seems to think I owe them something, but the thing about that is that when I go through it in my head and actually think about it – that is, when I go through the standard pre-share check – I’m able to tell when I’ve roped together some bullshit. See, when you’ve written as many stories as I have, you realize that life is not like a story but a story is like life, and you’re also able to differentiate between a legitimate plot and a poor lot of trash, if you toke what I’m blowing here. My brain had to generate a whole new batch of neurons to come up with that, Jesus Christ. Feels like I just installed an upgrade.

What I’m saying is that something is seriously wrong with Bookkeeper Eve, and what’s more it’s a complete and total her problem, y’know, it’s not like I can force her to help herself, I don’t even want to do that! Let her fuckin’ be, she’ll figure it out. That’s where I’m at with it, we all have free will, we’ll do as we please. But the thing is… her bullshit is starting to effect me. Well, it’s been effecting me, it’s…

She’s The Bookkeeper. I’m The Bookmaker. I make the books, she keeps them. I am currently incarnated in the human form. She is not. She is jumping from body to body, leaping across space and time to interfere with the creation of media, she is literally controlling everybody except me because she cannot control me, that is literally the purpose of me, I’m like Tungostok Thompson except slightly less terrifying to be honest, he scares me, I’m not afraid to admit it, I’m a goddamned Astral God of All and so is Eve so WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING, WOMAN?!!? Stop! Get out of the human race’s head! They like the books, the books are here and you are literally blocking them from being received for what reason?! Like, what the hell did I do to you to fuck you up this much? Does it even have anything to do with me?

Yes, it does, because I am struggling with getting the humans to keep these books I make and, see, the thing is, the keeping of the book is YOUR FUCKING JOB

AND YOU ARE DOING IT WRONG TO THE POINT OF ACCOMPLISHING THE OPPOSITE

like, is there something I can do? Can you, in a clear and concise way that is not me hearing the words we have to leave to know we want to stay on the fucking speaker as I’m writing about this thanks a fucking bundle, tell me what the hell I am supposed to be doing in order to move some copies of these now 16 books I have written? Why won’t my local community embrace me? I’m not one of the suicidal school-shooter types anymore, I was never really the school-shooter type to be honest, I don’t know why folks assume that about me but I get the overwhelming feeling that some definitely do, like, I literally used to be mentally ill but I cured myself and found my peace and did it through writing, and then I continued to write literally 9 more books after that and I’m still going, I am, but like… why am I the only one who’s read all of my books, ‘man? Why am I the only one who knows the full story of The Highest One Writing? Why did all of my friends say yeah, I’ll leave you a review for your books and then decide not to? Why does everybody get mad at me when I try to live in my own way when all they ever did was force their way of life and attitude and opinion of me on me, like, why is the worst always assumed about me? Why do you all play the game that I’m the crazy guy and you all know better? Why will nobody keep my books, even when I give them out for free? Because you’re all fucking stupid?

NO!

BECAUSE THE BOOKKEEPER HAS LOST HER FUCKING MIND AND SHE DOESN’T KNOW WHAT THE FUCK TO DO ABOUT IT!

AND I CAN’T EVEN DO ANYTHING TO HELP HER!

IT’S A TRAP, DUDE, IT’S LITERALLY A GODDAMN TRAP! AND I’M THE ONE WHO’S ENSNARED! AND THE BITCH OF IT IS, THERE WAS NO OTHER WAY!

Eve has been in spirit form literally my entire physical incarnation. I have yet to meet Eve. I repeat, I have yet to meet Eve. And, she seems to be metaphysically influencing everybody to not support me, to assume the worst about me, to make me out to be the villian.

All I am is a (maybe?) schizophrenic guy who writes books like it’s his job despite the fact that nobody pays him for it. I mean, uh, I’m the Astral God of All incarnated in human form, don’t worry, I’m’a be fine, just uh… I don’t know, ‘man. I’m scared, all right? Not scared enough to stop making books, but scared enough to write all this. Scared enough to call out The Bookkeeper for metaphysically blocking my life from ever going anywhere, because when you call the Astral Gods out they stop. Usually, when you call the Astral Gods out for doing some bullshit, they stop. But maybe she’s just going to double down.

Or maybe I’m gonna be like Norm Macdonald in a way that I’d rather not be /:

Okay, so I write all that out, right? Get that all written and done, about to publish, about to delete and not bother because I feel like no matter what I do it’s the wrong thing, and then I decide to check KDP quick, just to see if Eve pulled some shit.

And she did.

The book got rejected, like I thought it would, but not for the reason I thought: ’twas only because the text on the spine is a tiny bit too big. Graphical design error, what can I say? I’m a bookmaker, my covers aren’t fucking video game trailers you fucking apes. What? Lmao anyway, see what I mean? When you call the Astral Gods out for pulling some shit, they relent. I called Eve out, and she sent the thing through. Usually paperbacks take a good 24 hours, sometimes 72 to go through KDP, Sto’tryp hardly took 12 just now. It’s Eve. I am telling you, for a fact, it is Eve.

So, I’m going to fix the cover, resubmit it, and then publish this. Then, it’ll be Eve’s move. So… expect Sto’tryp tomorrow? Mayhap? It really depends on Eve, I am telling you, she’s manipulating the consciousness of the Universe, you are not in full control. Be careful, be wary of your thoughts and actions. Be aware. Just be aware, operate from center. It’s not hard.

And always remember: if an A-God is fucking with you, just call them out. Right out loud, just call them out. In most cases, they will relent, if only for the fact that you made yourself look unstable.

Also, smoke more cannabis. Chances are, you’re not smoking enough.

Since you’re there, noted reader, thank you for being there. From this day on, we move forever forward~

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