Natives | Sto’tryp #8

Boardtrip II
Can, Na, and Bis, You Bitch!

• • •

Lots of outcrop’ on this mountain. We’re heading towards one, but it’s not this one. We want the one at the top, I’ve explained to you a trillion fucking times that we want the one at the top but no, you sit down on every rocky outcrop we cross, the ‘man who sits down every chance he gets!

You’re probably wondering what the fuck I’m so mad for. Me? I’m just looking forward to this joint we’re gonna smoke. GMO cookies and peanut butter cookie, plural and singular, and it’s all going into the goddamn salad.

The trail clings to the side of the slope as it carries us closer to the top, almost like it did when that mosquito bit into your ass, but there’s no rotten log to walk instead this time. No rocky outcroppe, either. Nope, we just walk this sideways trail, and you struggle, and I laugh, and then I struggle even harder. But still I laugh.

But still I laugh as you struggle.

You cannot for the life of you remember leaving your house this morning.

Up and up we go.

Up and up we go.

Y’know, the shape of these rocks and how they’re all laid out like benches and staircases, all of these triangles and merkabahs littered amongst the trailwä’… you might think there was once a population of humans, of ancient natives, see, of Native Wuesterians who settl’d ‘pon these mountain’, built their grand temples of crystal, of grand wood and stone…

Yeah, you might think that. I wouldn’t be surprised at all if you thought all of that. But me? See, I’m just looking forward to this joint we’re gonna smoke.

I can literally see the summit. We’re almost there.

This has been the eighth subchapter of Boardtrip II: Can, Na, and Bis, You Bitch!, which is hidden in the front of the book Sto’tryp. Here is everything you need to know about it:


The Hillside Commons is an actual library of content. Click here to peruse.

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If you’re there, hypothetical reader, thank you for being there. From this day on, we move forever forward~

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