Posted in The Bookmaker's Note

Happy Holiblaze | The Bookmaker’s Note 4/20/21

Writing log: OTR +3,917 words | TBN +1,016 words


Happy Holiblaze you sons of bitches. I once said in this blog that books made with marijuana involved in the creative process always end up being bullshit books. I have come to either the realization or the understanding – I’m not sure which one it is, but there is a difference in this context – that it is actually up to you entirely and the marijuana may actually play a very minimal role in the production of a bullshit book.

If you’re gonna make a book, you’re gonna make a book. When that book is done, it will reflect the amount of effort you put into it, simple as that. If you made the book right all the way through, it will show. If you put only enough effort into the book for it to become a bullshit book cough Flowers cough Under the Hood cough I don’t even know I just feel like they’re my weaker works cough I even made Under the Hood sober cough then it will become a bullshit book. If the book gets done and the final product is satisfactory and you were intoxicated the entire time you were putting it together, then so be it. To each his own; if that completes your cypher, fuck it, amen, and that’s word to Godemis!

So does that mean I’m just sitting around getting high all day every day and not really putting up the ridiculous numbers I’m flaunting in these posts? If they’re even ridiculous? I don’t even know because nobody will answer my end of the post question? Maybe. Maybe I didn’t actually write any of my books, maybe the books in the pictures are just a cardboard prop and all the posts are just unknown foreign fiction poorly translated into English with names and locations changed. Maybe I’m getting high and writing all day and the numbers are real, or maybe I’m just writing all day and then smoking at night because finding weed requires time and effort and I must conserve. Or maybe I haven’t smoked since I put out Flowers – my 9th book, by the way, 9 of 11, soon to be 12, ‘man can I count or what? – because weed is legal now but not publicly available for sale yet and I’m trying to live a fantasy for a few goddamn minutes at the end of my day. It’s none of your fucking business what’s going on in my life, okay? I’m making these posts to connect with my audience and you need to back the fuck up, bucko. Listen, want to know what’s going on with me that’s your business? This here: I’ve become self-conscious about my flagrant apostrophe usage as of late. Like, using don’ow instead of dunno or go’n’a instead of gonna. In dialogue, too, like, I often go for the hillbilly thing ‘nd if’n’ I start goin’n’a’bunch’a words’re easy t’stack t’gethr and th’dialogue’ll keep’er movin’ ’til whatever the fuck, you get my point, it’s ridiculous and I feel like I need to chill with it. So I am. I sometimes feel like when I’m writing if I do something one way once I need to do it the exact same way for the rest of eternity or else I’ll break some rule, but there are no rules to writing except to sit down and fill the blank space with symbols. Do whatever the fuck you want, whatever gets the project done, whatever gets the next line written. Do your shit and shut the fuck up about your excuses for fuck’s sake!

I feel like I occasionally get confrontational in these posts. You should know that it’s your fault entirely and it wouldn’t happen so much if you didn’t push me and make me walk across the room and beat you upside the fuckin’ head like this. Look what you make me do!

But yeah, ‘man. 4/20. Weed day. I don’t know what the fuck weed is. I used to think I knew exactly what it was, I had all these crazy borderline delusional theories about how the world worked and shit, I was still getting high off my own supply if you toke what I’m blowin’. Started to believe the bookmaking ideas applied to the real world. Coincidences kept lining up which seemed to suggest I was onto something, that I had figured out these hidden secrets of perception through which the universe communicated secret messages to me and that my every breath was leading to some big climactic showdown or some bullhockey like that. ‘Man, that’s just storybook shit, that doesn’t happen. Like, it can happen, but it doesn’t happen. Just gotta stay grounded, it isn’t that hard. You can’t keep it moving if both feet aren’t on the ground, ‘man, that’s all there is to it.

So you may have noticed I didn’t hit my word goal today. Like, I made a whole-ass post about setting a challenge for myself to do 6,000 words a day and here I am legit 2 days in coming up short already. Well, get off my dick and give the Shopfy stalker a turn, first of all – 2 pm today – and second of all, I’m just posting this now because I want it to land on 4/20 – fuck off, I know it’s a few minutes late – because the post is dated. Because I feel like I set rules for myself in writing despite writing being the artform of anarchy. I’m going to hit the 6 thou, hit the bed, then get up tomorrow and do however much I can. Tomorrow’s Wednesday, weekend Wednesday bitches. Wow, I’m still here.

This has been your daily dose of whatever the fuck this is. If fear does not hold you back, comment your daily word goal! Maybe if I demand it rather than request it I’ll get some characters for this The Bookmaker’s Note Volume 1 shit I’m throwin’ together top of ’22. Happy Holiblaze, y’bunch’a dirty fuckin’ hippies.

If you’re there, hypothetical reader, thank you for being there, and know I burned one down for you today. From this day on, we move forever forward~

Posted in The Bookmaker's Note

Editing | The Bookmaker’s Note 4/18/21

Writing log: OTR +6,490 words


Fuckin’ did it. When I woke up this morning, I decided that I owed myself an extra 3,000 words for being the shithead yesterday and not writing. It took all day – it will be past midnight when I post this, and this is not an apology for that – but I fuckin’ got that shit done. Feels fucking good, ‘man.

So I’m giving myself a challenge this week. I was browsing on facebook (I know, I feel ashamed) and I saw this dude in one of the two writer groups I joined posting pictures of himself in a treehouse talkin’ about how he was on a writer’s retreat and he wrote 11,000 words that day and set a new record for himself. I was tempted to comment Good job dude, my record is 22,000. Literally twice as much as you, and I wasn’t even in a treehouse. Beat that, you son of a bitch but I thought it might come off as rude so I merely closed the page and got the fuck off facebook like any self-respecting human should. But it got me thinking: I don’t write enough. Like, 3,000 words a day is fine, but it’s light. When I wrote The 2020 Event |The Main Event| I was bangin’ out 6,000 on a daily basis easy, sometimes I even got above 10,000, and I was fucking looney back then. I’m in a much better place mentally today, I can write more. So I’m fidna.

Here’s the challenge. It’s not really a challenge, more like a trial run, but here’s what I’m doing this week. Monday and Tuesday, 6,000 each. Wednesday, however much I manage to get done. Thurs, Fri, Sat, 6,000 each. Sunday, however much. The 6,000 days will give me a minimum of 30,000 words for the week (roughly 100 pages) and whatever I do on the off days will pile on top. That will be progress. I don’t think I’m going to stop writing during the editing process for OTR, either. Why bother stopping when I can keep the momentum going and get ahead on the next project? No, quantity does not imply quality, but quality can be achieved through quantity. I’m biting a youtuber called Joel Haver on that one but it’s true ‘man, quality by means of quantity. Got’a practice to get good. That reminds me of tomorrow’s TBN, I already know what I’m going to write about. But that’s tomorrow.

Another thing I saw on facebook that got me fired up was this writer who posted a one-star review she got from someone who read her book and was offended at the massive amounts of proofreading errors in said book, and a bunch of other writers were in the comments saying yeah well you fucking deserve it. It’s just like, calm the fuck down. It’s just writing. I’ve read books, both indie and industry, littered with proofreading errors and it really doesn’t bother me a lot. Like, it doesn’t make the book unreadable. I don’t love it, I won’t lie, but I’m able to get the fuck over the fact that another author didn’t pay as close attention to their work as I wish I was able to pay to my own and still absorb the meaning that author put into their words which they cared enough about to write them down and publish them for the world to judge.

That’s not to say I’m out here letting proofreading errors fly left and right, either. Yeah, I let the wondrous and wonderous thing go for The Monksville Chronicles. You know what else I let go for that book? The “this is not real” disclaimer on the publishing page? It uses both its and it’s in the same line and only one of them is correct. But I let it fly, among other stuff I’m sure. For The Monksville Chronicles I let it all fly because The Monksville Chronicles is an old fucking book, I made it when I was less experienced and it should reflect that fact. The disclaimer in OTR has been corrected, and that’s not the only change to my publishing page formula I’m making with OTR either. Writers are artists, we are meant to grow and evolve and obsessively going over our past pieces of work is not how we evolve. It’s not how I evolve, anyway. What’s already written is written, dawg. What’s that next line go’n’a be, what’s your next book go’n’a be about? If you can’t write the next thing, you’re dead. That’s just what it is, baby, word to Charles Bukowski.

Lmao you’d think I was the woman who made the facebook post. But like, whatever. I don’t know why it bothered me. It’s late, I just got finished writing 6,000 words. I’m just riffing at this point, no filter allowed, I’m on some OG Sidney Blake shit. This blog series was very much inspired by Sidney Blake, if you didn’t know that. He’s the main character of Untitled Bigfoot Project and a fat chunk of his story is told through journal entries. This isn’t literally my journal, of course, but that’s where it came from with the Progress log (which is now the Writing log, officially) and everything. Yeah, ‘man.

But editing. Editing is definitely important. Almost everybody says that you absolutely need an outside editor to look at your stuff, that editing your own work is basically pointless. I don’t know about that one. I think it’s an important skill to have. When somebody else proofreads or even critiques your work, all they’re essentially doing is telling you how to change it to be more like something they would do. I miss stuff when I edit my own work, yeah. I’m not perfect, I think that’s blatantly obvious. But I’m better at self-editing now than I was when I first started. I think someone who can’t adequately edit their own work is at a disadvantage if anything. So what, your old books have errors. Make a new book and try harder on the proofreading, then. Also, maybe don’t go on Facebook and publicly bitch about it. Or anything. Fuck bitching about things in general. Fuckin’ find something to do.

Side note, I long for the day my books start getting reviews. I foresee a new blog series. But that’s the future.

Anyhow, I don’t know why I’m still writing the words on this screen. This shit’s 1,000 words long, I cracked 7,000 today. Bitchin’. But yeah ‘man, today was a good day. OTR chapter 4 is now 7 subchapters long. I’m about to dip, but first I have to ask: How many words do you like to write in a day when you’re working on something?

Oh, also, Shopify stalker struck again at 3 am and 6 pm. Lowkey inspiring in a way.

If you’re there, hypothetical reader, thank you for being there. From this day on, we move forever forward~

Posted in The Bookmaker's Note

Writing | The Bookmaker’s Note 4/17/21

Progress log: Ø


Today, I was the shithead. I woke up with the intention of writing at least 3,000 words. I just straight-up did not do it. I won’t even make any excuses, I just didn’t write today. I spent a couple hours throwing together a skeletal working manuscript for OTR, but that was little more than procrastination. I get stuff done when I’m putting off getting stuff done; all the same I did no writing. I’m not really sure what stopped me, either. Even the voices were egging me on to write, but I just didn’t do it. Probably just a me thing. We’ll try again tomorrow.

Pettily obligatory question time: If you’re a writer, how many words do you like to write in a day when you’re working on a project? And if you’re not a writer, why the hell not?

If you’re there, hypothetical reader, thank you for being there. From this day on we move forever forward~

Posted in The Bookmaker's Note

Life | The Bookmaker’s Note 4/16/21

Progress log: wrote ~3200 words towards OTR


I hit my minimum today. I’m good with it. I could have written more, but I also could have been a shithead and written less. Today I am not the shithead, and that is a victory.

One of those not much to say days tbh. The Shopify stalker is still at it. Stared at the running book at 9 last night then again today at 6 pm. At least they didn’t look first thing in the morning, y’know? That’s the weirdest part of this for me, the 6/7 am views. But imagine if I got an order for the running book and then the views just stopped. Like. All this time the fellow was just trying to decide whether or not to make the purchase. Plot twist of the century.

I don’ow, ‘man. The wind continues to blow, y’know what I’m sayin’? Just another day. The sky could be falling. I could be out of my folks’ house. But it isn’t. And I’m not. And that’s okay. Some days are gray and dreary. Either the sun or a storm is coming, and when it’s done the other will follow right behind. Life, ‘man. It ain’t always peaceful like this. The only thing life always is is life, and that’s okay too. Shit, the only reason I’m still typing right now is to feel the keys bounce back against my fingertips, and even that’s okay. We’re just out here doing our thing, ‘man. I mean we, too, you and me. We’re both human and we’re both out here doin’ our thing. The wind blows in whichever direction it pleases and we’re just out here doing our thing.

A’ight, I’m gettin’ out’a here. You know the drill; if you don’t, every day I ask for a hypothetical reader to comment their daily writing goal. It hasn’t happened yet.

Yet.

If you’re there, hypothetical reader, thank you for being there. From this day on, we move forever forward~

Posted in The Bookmaker's Note

Bullet | The Bookmaker’s Note 4/15/21

Progress log: wrote ~3,400 words towards OTR


Dodged a fucking bullet today. Got the new tires for Bessy. Was supposed to drop the car off at lunchtime, wound up dropping it at 9:30 am. It was set to rain around lunchtime and I wouldn’t have a ride home, I almost had to walk like 8 miles through the rain. Fuck that noise. Got my mom to follow me there and then drop me back off at home. Dodged a fucking bullet. I’m still out of breath.

OTR is coming along nice though. The story is doing the thing where it evolves all by itself as I tell it and I’m really enjoying the course it’s taking. In Existence there’s a slew of these characters called Astral Gods and I’ve been wanting to write a story involving some of them ever since I started the Third Spiral; OTR is that story. I could go on and on about it but listen, I really don’t feel like it right now. A specific relative is coming over for a pizza dinner, and that’s a bullet I just can’t dodge.

If you want to, comment how many words you like to hit in a day when you’re working on a project. If you don’t want to, then fuckin’ don’t. I’m not your dad.

If you’re there, hypothetical reader, thank you for being there. From this day on, we move forever forward~

Posted in The Bookmaker's Note

Real | The Bookmaker’s Note 4/14/21

Progress log:


Some days I just don’t feel like doing shit. Today is one of those days.

I woke stressed as hell about Bessy’s goddamn flat tire. Shortly after I woke up I remembered that I have a credit card (i’ll even giv u the #s if u don’t believe me) and therefore will be able to get new tires without going broker. I am fine. Logically, I know there is nothing to worry about with the goddamn tires. I even went and set som’n’ up at the gas station, like, I know and understand that it is fine. It just won’t… click, I guess. I’m still stressed out and I just don’t feel like doing jack shit today lmao. It’s fuckin’ Wednesday. It’s a Wednesday-ass Wednesday, a Wednesday if ever there were a Wednesday. Worst day of the week by far. Time’s not real, but Wednesday is a bitch regardless. Irregardless, even.

So I’m in the woods right now, 2:00 pm, doing my backwoods shit. Whatever that might mean. Hey, I could be injecting pure heroin into my eyeballs with one hand and jackin’ off with the other for all you know. There is a slight chance I might just be listening to music and vibing, but, y’know. Of course that’s what I would say. Wait, where am I?

So I’m in the woods right now. My author copy of The Monksville Chronicles, the metaphorical key to unlocking the book’s rerelease, is expected to be delivered between April 28th and April 30th. A full fortnight, ‘man. Goddamn. It might be a blessing in disguise, as a fortnight may be long enough for me to finish OTR without any interruptions. I’ll get on that tomorrow. I’m not doing shit today.

Technically I’m doing shit today. This blog series is a thing. I don’t know if this is clear or not but nothing below the three dots (or whatever divider there is beneath the Progress log, I don’t know what you see when you read this) is meant to be taken seriously at all. I started this series to connect with my audience and in order to do that I must be real, so le’me be real with you about two things right quick. One, I like writing ridiculous and occasionally worrisome bullshit. I think it’s absolutely hilarious and you will not convince me otherwise. Two, at the start of the new year I’m going to compile all of these posts into a book called The Bookmaker’s Note Volume 1. The description will be Nine months’ worth of ravings from a madman.

So technically I’m doing shit today. How is Amazon going to take a full fortnight to print and ship me a single book? Sweet Christ. Whatever, que sera sera. It’s not like The Monksville Chronicles will be the book that suddenly gets me a lot of followers, y’know? I don’t know if any one book will do that. I know for a fact that OTR won’t be that book, OTR is fucking derranged. I love it a lot but I must be real with you, it’s, fuckin’, it’s one’a them ones if you smell what I’m steppin’ in.

But yeah, I’ve been thinking about that a lot lately. About the one thing you must do to elevate to the next level, so to speak. Just the concept of the one in general, of things miraculously falling into place one day. I don’t think it happens. I think it can happen, but I don’t think it happens. Do you know what I mean by that? Like, it can happen, but it’s not something to be counted on. You just got’a keep going, hold your nose to the grindstone until there’s no grindstone left at which point you replace the goddamn grindstone and get your nose on it, that’s how I like to look at it. Listen, as far as I can tell, the only way to ensure that you fail is to have nothing going on. Anything can succeed, ‘man, you won’t know ’til it happens. I’ve written eleven books, one of which I’m rereleasing in a fortnight, and a twelfth one is under production. I’m fuckin’ solid. I can fuck off today. Hell, I could fuck off even if I had nothing going on, we all have free will, we can all do whatever we want – but why am I being so defensive about it? aaaaAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH

In the woods. 3 pm. Backwoods shit goin’ full force right now. Just uh, just sort’a here. Folks ask How are you? and my answer is always I certainly am. Is that a bad thin

A branch just broke and fell from the tree above me, landed right in my lap. It didn’t hurt, it’s just a twig, mere kindling, but it could have been a widowmaker. Shit ‘man, I could have literally just died were this a different Universe. My heart is goin’.

Now, is there some Existential real-time symbolism to be found in that little exchange just went down just now, the puny branch falling in my lap as I type the thing about how I say I certainly am when asked How are you? or is it just a meaningless coincidence? I used to be sure it meant something, absolutely positive, but now I’m less so. It’s kind’a like the idea of the one – the convenient incidents can have meaning, but they are not inherently meaningful. Kind’a like words.

You know those outdoor foldup chairs that you carry around in a sleeve? Like, with the poly-whatever arms and seat and back and the metal frame? I’m on one of those right now. It doesn’t have a carrying sleeve but I’m sittin’ on it. In the woods. Doing backwoods shit.

Heheheheh.

Shit, it’s supposed to start raining soon. At like, 4ish. That’s why I’m having the campfire now. I also had some longpork frankfurters that needed cooking, but I always have longpork in need of cooking. Always.

But yeah, I just stay out here ’til it starts raining and boom, fire goes out all by itself. That’s how it’s supposed to go down. Little did he know, that’s not how it went down at all.

Just kidding. I’m still out here, it has yet to go down.

Books, ‘man. Makin’ books. There is something about making a book that I am just fucking obsessed with. I find an indescribable thrill in it that exists nowhere else in life, truly. Spending all the time writing a story and then putting it together all nice in a book, like, god-fuckin-damn! Fuckin’, I put books in the back of my books. Been doing that ever since the beginning. Both of the The 2020 Event books have shorter books hidden in the back of them. Untitled Bigfoot Project is a novel about a writer writing a novel about bigfoot; the novel he writes is called The Face of Fear and I wrote the entire The Face of Fear and stuck that son of a bitch into the back of Untitled Bigfoot Project. A couple of y’all bought copies of Untitled Bigfoot Project, you know what I’m about. I’m doing it with OTR, too. That motherfucker is go’n’a have a whole short story anthology in the back, mark my goddamn words. And I’m doing it for canonical purposes, too, it’s not even a gimmick. The story simply demands it, who am I to say no? Fuckin’, I am all in on this shit. I couldn’t stop even if I wanted. The Bookmaker’s Note Volume 1 coming January 2022, The Monksville Chronicles rerelease coming May 2021, OTR coming Eventually 2021.

As I typed that bit, my shuffle changed the song from In Due Time to New Blessings, both by ¡MAYDAY!. Is that happening a meaningful convenient incident, or is it just a meaningless coincidence? Sweet Christ, does it matter? Fuckin’, either way, I’m not doing shit today. Just cookin’ this longpork and loungin’ under the budding trees. I have a framed picture out here, a painting of the shore of a lake in prime springtime. I like to look at it, because it’s only as real as it isn’t. ‘Man, it’s only as real as it isn’t.

I’ve been inside for a few hours now. It never rained.

How many words do you like to write in a day when you’re doing shit? Let me know so I can like and probably not reply to your comment.

If you’re there, hypothetical reader, thank you for being there. From this day on we move forever forward~

Posted in The Bookmaker's Note

Spring Cleaning | The Bookmaker’s Note 4/13/21

Progress log: completed preliminary backend rerelease work for The Monksville Chronicles


So I did this like this today.

[8:54 am] Good morning! The Shopify stalker stared at my running book at 4 am today, the pattern is tightening back up. In other news, I’ve been up for an hour and a half and I’m about to shit for the third time today! I’m not even sick, either! My bowels are movin’ you sons of bitches, hee-yah! The rain is over and all the leaves are opening up, I’m’a call this post Spring Cleaning and I’m’a take my third shit of the day and then I’m’a get movin’!

[9:58 am] The Monksville Chronicles is published in paperback and the ebook is submitted! This isn’t me announcing it, I’m going to do the normal book announcement post I do when I have a physical copy, which I will order as soon as the page on Amazon updates with the correct price and cover art. I raised the price from $9 to $10 for the paperback. The new paperback has a higher printing cost, it felt appropriate. eBook is staying the same, as I didn’t add more than 10,000 words. The autographed copy cost might go up a dollar, I’m not sure. I have a whole Excel spreadsheet dedicated to pricing out the autographed copies, I have to plug in the new numbers. Anyway, so I write with Scrivener, right? It’s a writing program, really great stuff. Up until now I’ve had all of my writing in one single Scrivener file. Like, all of it. I don’t know why I was doing it like that, the shit took 5 minutes to back itself up every time I closed it. So now all the books have their own files. Been meaning to do that for a while. Spring cleaning.

[11:56 am] Finished prepping the blog posts for the second chapter. I’m trying out a new post strategy for this one, see? In the past I would put one subchapter up per post, but sometimes the subchapters are long. One of UBP’s subchapters was literally 12,000 words long. That’s too long for a blog post. So for TMC (and probsibly going forward) I’m going to cap out at around 1,200ish words per post. If the subchapter is longer than that, I break the shit into multiple parts. It’s good because blog posts shouldn’t be super long and also this will stretch the book posts out longer and give me more time. Killing the blogging game rn.

[1:33 pm] I inadvertently used both wondrous and wonderous in The Monksville Chronicles. Only one of these is technically correct. I feel like I need to decide right now whether I give a shit or not; I’m’a let it fly. It’s fine, y’know? Whether I’m using wondrous or wonderous you still understand what I’m try’n’a say. Going forward I’ll try to not make that mistake again, but as for The Monksville Chronicles? It’s not a new book. And even if I change that one word, it’s still not going to be perfect. I’m just a ‘man.

[5:03 pm] Accidentally posted post 78 of The Monksville Chronicles. Immediately unposted and deleted it, then cleared it from the trash, then I took my laptop outside and stomped on it and spit on it and waterboarded it except with gasoline and then I did an ancient dance which summoned the full moon to the sky, and beneath that full moon I set fire to my laptop and continued to dance and sway as it burned to ashes. Will be careful not to accidentally hit publish again.

[6:15 pm] The final subchapter of the final chapter of The Monksville Chronicles lands on post #100. On the fucking dot, you bitch. That, that right there, is what’s called a good sign, y’see? Splitting the longer posts is the fuckin’ move. There is one subchapter that didn’t split well so I kept it at 1,500 words, but the rest all got split if they got into the 1,300s. Post #100 on the fucking dot.

[7:17 pm] The blog posts are DONE. Sort of! I can’t actually finish them until I get the physical copy of The Monksville Chronicles (paperback and ebook both now available on Amazon, ho-ho hey-hey) but all 124 of them are set up so all I need to do is add 124 to each title, paste in the links, add the featured image, and schedule. The battle is halfway through. I don’t need to be finishing this late in the day, but I took lots of breaks. It was gorgeous outside today. I didn’t do shitting abs day because I shit you not, I literally shit like 10 times today and I thought it would be too ironic. But I walked in a park and then came home and ran. So uh, anyway, I added the Amazon links to the The Monksville Chronicles tile on my Books page. I’ll add the links to read the text for free and to buy an autographed copy when I have the physical copy. It’ll be here when it gets here. That pretty much wraps it up for the preliminary backend rerelease work. Preliminary backend rerelease work, well goddamn doesn’t that sound pretentious and aggrandized. I’m goin’ with it.

Now the question is, did I actually come back to this post at random points throughout the day or did I just type it all up now? And the other question is, how many words do you like to write in a day when you’re working on a project?

If you’re there, hypothetical reader, thank you for being there. From this day on, we move forever forward~

Posted in The Bookmaker's Note

Rain and Coldy | The Bookmaker’s Note 4/12/21

Progress log: Finished reviewing The Monksville Chronicles, submitted for republishing. Began backend release work


Another rain and coldy day today, ‘man. Yesterday was like this and I decided to piss the back half of the day away. Today I didn’t and I got shit done. But first, I have to cover something important.

So my Shopify stalker is keeping up his grind, she skipped looking at the running book yesterday and then took a peek at the three o’clock am hour today, as per his pattern. The pattern appears to be loosening though, she used to look once every day and then he was looking twice a day every other day and now she’s only looked once today. Maybe he’ll buy the fuckin’ book soon, who knows? I’ll keep you updated when there’s more activity.

That out of the way, I finished reviewing The Monksville Chronicles and implemented all the pencil strokes I made in the proof into the manuscript today. Boom, done, ready to go. I submitted it for republishing and now I’m waiting for the confirmation so I can put up the ebook too. That’ll take however long it takes.

After that I went outside to get the mail and decided it was too rain and coldy to run but I was still going to exercise, get in that abs day I skipped yesterday. Then I fell coming up the goddamn stairs and decided that shitting abs day can fuck off, I had shit to do anyway.

Thus began the backend work. First was the Shopify. I took down the old version of The Monksville Chronicles and made a short blog post saying I did so. Then I hit the WordPress and updated the books page, which included breaking a few links, updating the cover art picture and details for The Monksville Chronicles, and moving The Monksville Chronicles to the Third Spiral part of the page. Then I updated the The Monksville Chronicles page with all the new text and set it on private, where it shall remain until I can get all the new links together which will be when I get publishing confirmation so calm the fuck down A’IGHT? IT’S COMING! Then I started setting up the blog posts, got through the first chapter, and now we are here.

In other words, I didn’t do jack shit today.

Nah jk, shit got done, buckaroo. It was mostly monotonous shit and therefore was egregious, but it got done nonetheless and I got more to do tomorrow, and then eventually I will get back to writing OTR. Hee-yah, mother-expletive. Hee-yah. Oh, and uh, the obligatory How many words do you like to write in a day when you’re working on a project? There ya go. This here’s been a blog post.

If you’re there, hypothetical reader, thank you for being there. From this day on, we move forever forward~

Posted in The Bookmaker's Note

Cold and Rainy | The Bookmaker’s Note 4/11/21

Progress log: reviewed 100ish of The Monksville Chronicles‘s remaining [however many] pages


It’s a cold and rainy and dreary Sunday. I have decided I shall piss the rest of the day away after posting this post. If ever there was a day to piss away, today is that day. I’m not running today because it is cold and raining, and I’m not turning on my workout app because shitting abs day can wait ’til tomorrow. I’m only working until [whatever time this gets posted] because reviewing a proof copy is taxing on the brain despite it not being very time consuming, especially in the case of The Monksville Chronicles. Like, I’ve been through this manuscript at least 200,000,000 times at this point. This is part of the reason I keep my editing process down to 3 drafts, I start to feel like I’m caught in an acid thought-loop if I have to re-read something over and over and over, it drains the hell out’a me. Obviously editing is more than just reading but you know what I mean. Or maybe you don’t. I don’t know you.

Listen, I’m’a get out’a here. I was going to rant about something or other but it’s null at this point. Water is falling from the sky like piss into a toilet. I got shit done today, and I’ll have shit to do tomorrow. What else is there?

Btw, how many words do you like to hit in a day when you’re working on a project? I’m go’n’a keep asking ’til I get an answer, and you know what? I’m go’n’a keep asking even after I get an answer. You know what else? Me either.

If you’re there, hypothetical reader, thank you for being there. From this day on, we move forever forward~

Posted in The Bookmaker's Note

Bothered | The Bookmaker’s Note 4/10/21

Progress log: reviewed 94 of The Monksville Chronicles‘s 282 pages


I’m bothered. You wan’a know why I’m bothered? Because folks are strange, meaning one folk in particular is strange. Want to know what I’m talking about specifically? All right, I’ll tell you.

So I have this online store through Shopify, right? It’s called rePurpp, and through it I sell autographed copies of my books and The Hillside Commons merchandise, most of which is idiotic. I haven’t moved a single unit through this store yet, but it’s there, I have it, it’s real and it’s mine and I’m hemorrhaging money and it’s fine. It’s like I tell myself when I’m curled up in the fetal position in the corner at night bashing my head into the walls: It’ll all make sense eventually.

But that’s not why I’m bothered. I told you, it’s because of a human being. Aren’t you paying attention? Christ on a fucking crutch, I don’t even know what’s going on right now. My family is downstairs watching golf on the television. Golf, for fuck’s sake. I don’t know what the hell.

SO this store of mine, I have it through Shopify. I said that. Christ I’m tired. So I have this store, right? I can see who visits this store on the daily, and I usually check the viewership in the mornings when I’m booting up the social medias for my allotted thirty seconds. This is what I’ve seen over the past ten days, I’ll list it for you. Unless otherwise stated, the views come from within the USA.

  • Today: the running book was viewed at 6 am and 2 pm
  • April 9th: nothing
  • April 8th: the running book was viewed at 1 am and 6 pm
  • April 7th: nothing
  • April 6th: the running book was viewed at 3 am and 12 pm
  • April 5th: someone from Canada looked at my front page
  • April 4th: the running book was viewed at 2 am and 7 pm
  • April 3rd: the running book was viewed at 3 am
  • April 2nd: the running book was viewed at 7 am
  • April 1st: the running book was viewed at 7 am

Are we noticing a pattern here?! What the fuck?? It’s most likely the same human, because the pattern is there, and it’s been going on for a fuckin’ while now. At least a few weeks. I won’t even lie, I’m about 200% sure I know who’s doing it, and I won’t say his name nor will I reveal her gender, but I’m about 300,000% sure I know who it is and it creeps me the fuck out, ‘man! I am bothered by this nonsense! Like, what the fuck are you doing?! If you wan’a buy it then fine, buy the shitting running book, be my first Shopify sale, make my day! But don’t fuckin’… like, what are you even doing??? Why do you look at the same page on my goddamned store day after day like this?! How do you find yourself looking at Hunter’s running book at 3 am? Why do you roll out of bed and start your day by bringing up my store and staring at the running book?! What confuses me most of all: why the fuckin’ running book??? That shit is a 100-page pamphlet that I pulled out of my ass like a hard piece of shit, why that book?! Is it because the cover features my semi-pubescent body circa freshman year of high school, is that it? Golly, I hope not! Although if I were to find out that was the reason, I would be a little more comfortable because at least I would know what the fuck is going on! Like… just what the fuck?!

So there. Now you know why I am bothered. Today was fucking pushup day and I am being stalked on my Shopify store. Instead of folks buying THC beanies and Feller of Rock sweatshirts and autographed copies of my books which I put my heart and undying soul into, someone is drooling over my running book every day of their goddamned life. Sweet Christ. What do I do? What would you do? Also, how many words do you like to hit in a day when you’re writing a book?! I need to get out of here.

If you’re there, hypothetical reader, thank you for being there. From this day on, we move forever forward~